Whoa, a few days late on this on, where does the time go.
What have I been up to recently? I'm reading (listening to) 'Solve for Happy', a book that is touted as taking a mathematical or engineering approach to solving for happy as if it was an equation, and coming up with novel ideas not seen in the other books out there. Hmmm ... I'm not quite seeing it that way, maybe I misread the reviews. It is interesting but I'm over 80% done and I'm not seeing these equations I was hoping for. It's an interesting listen, and if you have 11 hours on your hands, maybe while commuting, check it out. For my unified theory of 'why we do what we do' on this website I'll add that the default mood of the auto pilot part of our brain is grumpy. I already mention that it's against you no matter what because your desires are usually long term and it's are short term, so it will tell you to give up when things get tough, and it will tell you to take a break when you're making progress. What he points out in this book is that the auto pilot is always on the look out for something that might be bad, something that might hurt us. It's always assuming the worst in an effort to keep us alive. Being more cautious than less cautious will keep you alive, but it's also kind of always grumpy if you let it be your default state.
Aside from that book, but on the topic of being on the lookout for things that might harm you I like to point out things you should be worried about, and which things you shouldn't be as worried about. Some people worry about getting on airplanes, or driving, or they get excited for giant lottery draws they might win, but don't tend to be as worried as they should be about things like mental illness or cancer. As a general rule I think if you hear about something that has a 1 in 10 chance of happening or 1 in something less than 10, like 1 in 5, or 1 in 3 or, even 1 in 2 chance of happening to you, like they are saying about getting cancer, or experiencing mental illness or suffering loneliness, you should pay some, I mean, a lot of attention and do at least some simple things to try to make it less likely to happen to you.
The disturbing statistic I heard recently is, girls have a 1 in 3 chance, and boys have a 1 in 6 chance of being sexually abused by the time they are 18! Do you know 6 kids? Well this says 1 maybe 2 of them is likely to be a victim of sexual abuse! Can you believe it? Well believe it or not this is one of those situations where you should do something to try to prevent this.
The good news is the steps this article suggests are really simple things you can do to reduce the likelihood it will happen to a child you know, and simple things to share with other parents to help their children. It's basically a matter of talking about our bodies with our kids, giving them an idea of what's right and wrong, and what to do if they are in a situation that seems wrong. And, making it known to those around these kids to know they know what is right and wrong and what to do if they see something that seems wrong.
So, most people may be getting uncomfortable around now, wondering how to do this, how to have these conversations and when to have them, but the great thing is, there are amazing kids books out there designed just for this. Just get one or two, read through them yourself and then read through them with your kids. They won't know to be uncomfortable about it, so try not to be uncomfortable either.
Here's the article I was forwarded
It's a very worthwhile read, and it has links to the kids books in it. Next time you're thinking of buying a lottery ticket, and dreaming of all the great things you can do for your family with the winnings, realize you could use that money to buy a book that could do more than those lottery winnings could ever do to prevent distraught for your family, and the chances of losing by not playing (by not buying the book and reading it to your kids) are 1 in 6.